|
Post by Mr. Glow on Sept 11, 2011 19:18:55 GMT 1
Hmm, maybe I can help you out Mr. Glow. You happen to have Skype or MSN or any (communication client besides Private Messaging)? Sorry, I don't really use any of those. Thanks for offering to help, though!
|
|
|
Post by Cali on Sept 12, 2011 3:38:15 GMT 1
Maybe private messaging would be the best after all.
I'd really like to see this thing in the story section, Glow, so message me if you need any help, bro.
|
|
|
Post by Tillian Panthesis on Sept 30, 2011 2:45:28 GMT 1
Now stumbled onto another minor block, but this the one I can get over easily but... it requires a few deep breaths.
I'm up to the last part of the romance section of the game. You know that first infamous bit where Garrus turns on the Flux music, hoping it will create a 'mood'. The reason why it require a few deep breaths is because... I'm trying to stop giggling like immature schoolgirl when writing that part. It reminds of a generic romance girl flick. Then I feel bad afterwards.
Honestly, it's not badly written this game section. It kinda fits with the whole awkwardness that Garrus had to deal with the relationship, so I can't complain about the writing that much from BioWare.
Still... Wonderful.
|
|
|
Post by CAPT Issac R. Madden on Nov 13, 2011 4:35:47 GMT 1
The recent Mary Sue thread got me thinking about Ian again. As I've said, he's treading dangrously close to MS status and I want to bring him down to size as it were. Right now I'm toying with the idea of him getting busted for smuggling but avoiding jail time due to techincalities and good lawyer work.
Thoughts?
|
|
|
Post by Tillian Panthesis on Nov 13, 2011 15:14:59 GMT 1
Hmm... I might have to re-read your fan fic again just to get a clearer picture.
I'll get back to you asap.
|
|
|
Post by CAPT Issac R. Madden on Dec 11, 2011 4:51:00 GMT 1
Ok. In line with my not wanting to make Ian into a Gary Stu, I'm trying to figure out how the hell he pulls of his current job. I'm thinking his target (Onak) went and joined Eclipse after back-stabbing Helena Blake. This presents a problem as Ian has precisely zero backup as I doubt Aria would help him (doesn't affect her one way or another). Plus the Suns still have a bounty on Ian's head so they'll be gunning for him, the Blood Pack would be more likely to shoot Ian in the face rather than help him.
Right now my tentative plan is to have Ian go in with no weapons and improvise from there, but that smacks too much of Metal Gear Solid for my tastes. Ian's a badass, but he's no Solid Snake.
Any thoughts/ideas?
|
|
|
Post by Cali on Dec 11, 2011 20:58:03 GMT 1
Well, in chapters 7-9 of Cyan Steel the main characters rubbed elbows with Eclipse pretty roughly and had to make a deal with them to make sure no more shit went down.
I don't see how Ian wouldn't be able to creep in and somehow acquire Eclipse combat armor. People with less training than the common minuteman use disguises in real life more often than you think.
He could then get close to Onak when he's alone and use an improvised weapon such as a pipe, a length of cord or wire, or kitchen knife to take him out. If you don't wanna make it too Stuish you can have him almost screw up at times, such as Onak fighting back, knocking the weapon out of his hand temporarily or having an Eclipse trooper walk in wondering what's going on. There's lots of stuff that could go down with this.
|
|
|
Post by CAPT Issac R. Madden on Dec 11, 2011 21:50:53 GMT 1
Well, in chapters 7-9 of Cyan Steel the main characters rubbed elbows with Eclipse pretty roughly and had to make a deal with them to make sure no more shit went down. I don't see how Ian wouldn't be able to creep in and somehow acquire Eclipse combat armor. People with less training than the common minuteman use disguises in real life more often than you think. He could then get close to Onak when he's alone and use an improvised weapon such as a pipe, a length of cord or wire, or kitchen knife to take him out. If you don't wanna make it too Stuish you can have him almost screw up at times, such as Onak fighting back, knocking the weapon out of his hand temporarily or having an Eclipse trooper walk in wondering what's going on. There's lots of stuff that could go down with this. I see what you mean. Maybe Ian tries to do a snag-n-drag but gets fucked on the extratction. It would be easier to simply kill Onak, but his contract terms dictate a live capture only. Then again, Ms. Blake was non-specific on how healthy Onak had to be upon arrival...
|
|
|
Post by Cali on Dec 12, 2011 0:50:46 GMT 1
Oh it's a live capture only?
In that case, clourophorm rag it is!
|
|
|
Post by CAPT Issac R. Madden on Aug 17, 2012 22:19:21 GMT 1
And here I am yet again. Early on in my fic, when Ian awoke on the Citadel, the doctor examining him mentioned his brain activity being different than normal. Considering the relay accident he was in, I'm trying to explore that angle a bit. The "standard" for this in other fics is "protagonist become a Biotic God" but I want to try something a bit different.
Considering how he MacGuyver'd his way out of some deep shit and as an explanation for how well he's adapting, I thinking about saying that the relay accident caused something to happen where his brain processes information at a heightened rate which allows him to very quickly solve problems. A practical example of this would be that kick he used to stun the krogan in the bar fight scene: his mind processed everything and he subconsiously knew where to hit the krogan for greatest effect. Otherwise, his abilities are within normal human levels: he can't survive an ardat-yakshi, he can't do much against a biotic in a head-on fight unless he gets damn lucky, and so on.
So the question, yet again, is: am I making Ian out to be a Marty Stu by doing this?
|
|
|
Post by Tillian Panthesis on Apr 2, 2013 15:19:32 GMT 1
Suffer a slower writing pace at the moment. I was enjoying some poetic narration about a city, before a scene later of spotting the trouble, there's a fight scene I'm dealing with at the moment.
Putting a fight scene down on screen is hard for me. What do you think of writing fight scenes, did you have fun or you have other opinions about it.
|
|
|
Post by CAPT Issac R. Madden on Apr 3, 2013 4:25:00 GMT 1
Suffer a slower writing pace at the moment. I was enjoying some poetic narration about a city, before a scene later of spotting the trouble, there's a fight scene I'm dealing with at the moment. Putting a fight scene down on screen is hard for me. What do you think of writing fight scenes, did you have fun or you have other opinions about it. I enjoy writing fight scenes, though my way of writing them seems to be different than what I've seen others writ; probably due to me writing the scenes based on how I'd fight in a given situation and what I've observed in other people when they fight. That and I don't deal in Matrix-style bullshit outside of stories where that kind of thing would be plausible.
|
|
|
Post by Clint Johnston on Apr 3, 2013 5:42:46 GMT 1
I usually skip through fight scenes as quickly as possible, finding various abilities and amplifying them more than the game did (because in reality they are impressive) into a sort of God mode.
|
|
|
Post by CAPT Issac R. Madden on Apr 3, 2013 6:18:46 GMT 1
I usually skip through fight scenes as quickly as possible, finding various abilities and amplifying them more than the game did (because in reality they are impressive) into a sort of God mode. I try to strike a proper balance when it comes to the length and content of my fight scenes. I want them to be long enough to add to the story, but not be so long as to be tedious. Also, I make it a point to make the scenes realistic, since I view fighting as a form of art (in the sense of personal expression) alongside my writing and music. It's a point of pride for me that I seem to do well when writing the scenes and not fill them with the typical dreck that is so common in fics.
|
|
|
Post by Clint Johnston on Apr 3, 2013 6:39:34 GMT 1
Seeing as my work is parody focusing predominantly on plot deficiencies, it serves both my purposes well to speed through them.
|
|